#55: Word of the Year & Letter to Self Practices

I am not a New Year’s resolution kind of girl. Namely because of those who set one (50-60% of Americans), merely 5-9% actually accomplish them. They are usually hyper-goal focused and seek quicker gratification through them. Instead, I like to focus on two activities that I use over the course of the new year that are much more open ended. I consider them to be guiding lights that help me move forward with the intentional energy I wish throughout the year. The first activity is finding a word for my year; the second is a letter to myself as if the year has already occurred. I complete these activities between Thanksgiving and New Years. I will share how I utilize these tools of intention, but I want to underscore the importance of resonance. That being said: use elements of my process that resonate for you and ignore what doesn’t. 

[Word of the Year] 
    In recent years I have used the words believe, trust, and love. Often these words build onto the prior year’s word, but they don’t need to. I used believe in conjunction with the energy from Ted Lasso and with the intention to bolster self-confidence. From there I wanted to work on trust (specifically trusting myself and others). I found I had greater difficulty with trust and the next year I thought the openness surrounding the word love would help me progress with trust. I don’t get frustrated if I don’t “nail” growth with the word of the year but rather am able to notice how experiences and thoughts I have relate to that word. I also cue in when those words pop up in conversations, posts, books, quotes, etc. I will screen shot or reflect on those things, again because that word is closer to the forefront of my mind. 


    Originally, I thought my 2025 word was going to be savor. At this time last year, I was still pregnant and expecting to have our second child. Assuming I would be having my last baby in 2025, I told myself I wanted to savor the moments of growth in our family and our last baby. December 13th (ironically Friday The 13th, because of course) we learned of the nonviability of that pregnancy. I chose to pivot from that word and settled on vitality instead. With two losses in 2024, I knew I didn’t want to focus on that negative energy; I craved a more active and dynamic energy. Vitality embodies the essence of life force, energy, and liveliness. It reflects a state of being strong, active, and full of life. Vitality is not just physical energy but also emotional and mental zest—having the drive to pursue passions, overcome challenges, and embrace life with enthusiasm. When I chose to pursue a bodybuilding prep, I opened my note on my phone that had this definition and felt it aligned well. So, embracing that goal came from alignment with my 2025 word of the year. So, goals can come from alignment in energy that stems from a chosen word. It can also help us resist being pulled down by negative energy, feelings, and events. 

    I’ve incorporated a chosen-word practice since 2018, and now words often come to me much more easily than before. Early on, I would search words and find synonyms and create a list and just sit with those words to see which one I felt most compelled to settle on. I write this word as the “P.S.” to my letter that lives in my hard-copy agenda and on a note in my phone. I check in on the word and its definition routinely and do a mental check in or incorporate a reflection in my journaling practice about how the word is coming up for me. Focusing on vitality in 2025 helped me remember to proceed amidst disappointment and difficulty. I just sought the next baby step and knew energy would come if I just kept moving. While I may have struggled with my year of trust, I kicked ass with vitality this year. My word for 2026 came to me naturally: refine. I simply want to keep molding and working with what I have and where I am right now. The definition that lives in my phone reads “it’s not about tearing yourself down or starting over. It’s about sculpting. It’s subtle. It’s gradual. It’s careful, thoughtful improvement. Think of it like a jeweler slowly shaping a stone–each small adjustment brings out more clarity, more brilliance, more truth." This is the energy I seek with my physique in the bikini division and also myself as a whole. 


[Letter to Self] 
I have created a letter to myself each year since 2016. This practice was recommended to me by my friend and mentor Darla Beam (Plugging her website for Leadership and Coaching here: Darla Beam Leadership & Coaching). She expressed how people can use this as a check in for themselves or actually seal the envelope and only read it at the end of the year. For me I found resonance in checking in on my letter as the year progressed. It almost acted as a compass. I could acknowledge when I was on track or put something into perspective through the words I wrote. Or I could notice where I was deviating from what I hoped to work on. I wouldn’t berate myself, instead I would notice how I’d want to pivot or note that “well, I am not doing that, better keep that in the letter for next year…” To me my letter isn’t simply an actionable checklist, it's a breathing evolution of the self I aspire to become. I find acceptance when my expectations and reality as it relates to timelines have a gap–similar to how I can accept that trust was a harder year for my chosen word. 


For example, this year I really got out of practice of journaling and meditation. For one, my meditation app subscription ran out, and I did not seek a replacement. Journaling fell wayside after Genevieve stopped napping. I turned to productivity practices first thing in the morning since I no longer had naptime to do them (or to journal if I didn’t get to it that morning). Both of these practices I’d like to resume in 2026, by having them in my letter to self in 2025 it reminds me to attempt better routines and strategies to incorporate those valuable habits. 

The type of letter you write will greatly depend on personal preference. I will share my letter below, but please don’t feel daunted by its openness. I like to use my letter as a guiding energy that I could read any situations into. I know other people write more matter-of-fact goals or outcomes or descriptions. Whichever method you choose, simply notice how it feels as a tool as you navigate the year. And remember there are no rules: edit it, revise it, scrap it entirely and begin again if you find it doesn’t resonate. You might also just commit to it and notice how you’d pivot the following year. Tools are only valuable if we use them, so try to create something that holds significance for yourself. 

[Example: Kelly’s 2025 Letter to Self (Written November/December 2024)]
Dear Kelly, 
At the beginning of this year, you were still contending with the aftershocks of what you weathered in 2024. You did not let it suffocate you, but rather leaned into support of yourself and others, while processing and proceeding forward. 


You chose not to be weighed down by the negative, nor falsely elevated by hope. Instead, you chose to keep to the darkness—the mystery—and followed the path as it was without forcing a facade of control. 

You moved forward with a mind for sustainability and balance. You were grounded but not fixed. And you continued to place love over fear, and you flowed without expectations. You embraced not knowing what forward would look like and remained receptive and open both to protect your heart and to enjoy your experience. 

Meditating, journaling, and writing were practices that afforded you peace and bolstered your ability to weather anger and negative experiences. You better resisted stewing on negative events, thoughts and relationships. You accepted them without giving them your time or energy. 

You found solace in your ability to quiet your thoughts and words during times of stress. Angry initial reactions were more often replaced by compassionate responses. And when they weren’t, you rested in enoughness for self and others and recovered with ease. 

You continue to seek experiences and relationships that fill your and your family’s cup. You walk with a greater lightness. You keep curiosity and intrigue at the forefront and there is a radiance that emanates both around and within you. 

This version of you is confident in where you are and where you’re going, without truly knowing or naming either one. You have energy, confidence, trust, and love as you embrace the life that you’re living. 

Forward isn’t linear, it’s often deeper. And you don’t need to connect linear dots. Keep to what is and be with the winding path. You’ll go exactly where you’re meant to go. Relax into and be with whatever comes in front of you. 
Love, 
Kelly
PS Vitality 
(Vitality embodies the essence of life force, energy, and liveliness. It reflects a state of being strong, active, and full of life. Vitality is not just physical energy but also emotional and mental zest—having the drive to pursue passions, overcome challenges, and embrace life with enthusiasm.)


[Using these Tools in Community–Mastermind] 
Approximately seven years ago I created a women’s mastermind group. This group is composed of 6-8 women who commit to a season (January-December) for a two-hour zoom call. At season’s end each year women can re-commit to the group, take a break, or depart. Next season may be our largest yet with 8 confirmed women and potential two additional women who will sit in on our January call. For the last couple seasons, we have incorporated a word of year and letter to self. We share our letter and word at the January call, have a mid-year check in and reflect on their significance on the December call. Though the word or letter may be referred to in topics on various calls or at check ins. 

Using these tools in community–how I do with mastermind or a family member or friend–can really lock in accountability and also help you talk through how the tools are resonating for you. For example, someone in mastermind might send me a book recommendation or a quote or a song that they think might have some sort of connection to my word or what I’ve conveyed in my letter.  Or this person may be able to listen to your work through an experience or situation that arises to help you process and proceed. I will always harp on the value of community, connection, and vulnerability. These tools then can help you deepen connections with yourself and anyone you choose to share them with.

If you need an accountability partner or wish to craft a word or letter, I happily extend an offer to work with you as you do so, simply reach out to me. I hope you have a fantastic holiday season, and that you find time for reflection on where you find yourself at years end and invigorated to continue your journey of becoming into the coming year.