#51: Soccer Shots, and Why It's Not About Soccer (at least yet)

Today is the start to Genevieve's second season of Soccer Shots. Prior to this fall session, she participated in a summer session, and before that tried out a mommy & me gymnastics class in early spring. I want to discuss the value afforded to toddlers by participating in organized activities. 

Gymnastics 
When a friend suggested a local mommy & me gymnastics class, I jumped at the opportunity to enroll G. At the time, Genevieve was a few months under two. There were maybe 7 other babies and toddlers participating. Genevieve walked later than most (taking her first steps at 15 months but waiting until 18 months to prefer that to her power crawl). I thought that Gymnastics would be a great way to help her experiment with movement and develop coordination. She loved somersaults down the incline mat and running in a straight line along a path (the path was laminated paper on the floor to indicate where to place your hands to do a handstand, but G took them to be steppingstones to sprint along).

During her month of participation, she absolutely refused to sit for directions at circle time. In fact, the class was 45 minutes long, but Genevieve was always ready to go after 30 minutes. Rather than fight a fussy toddler (it was close to nap time after all) we'd simply wave and bow out early. I never saw this early departure as a "waste of money" because G was able to enjoy gymnastics for the time she was there, and I didn't need to juice out every minute to make it seem "worth it." There is a time to push and a time to let go, and I knew in this it was best to let go, and head home. 

Fortunately, day one her (very sweet and patient) coach told me "Don't worry about her following directions, you just follow her and wherever she decides to go." I was so grateful for her follow-the-child approach because I could focus on letting Genevieve explore and engage in her own way with the room, equipment, and people in the space (without being preoccupied with being polite). The coach would even walk around and give a suggestion or activity based on what we were playing with. We didn't choose to continue with gymnastics, but that doesn't mean we didn't find value in the experience. It's not to say either that I've written that off as something G won't do again. Instead, I see it as a meaningful opportunity for my toddler to be around an adult who gives directions (who is not a parent), other children around her age, different parents, and a unique and engaging environment to explore. In fact, Genevieve's love for running up and down those laminated paper rectangles reinforced my desire to try out a different activity that would better facilitate that interest and skill... soccer. 

Soccer Shots! 
For Genevieve's first Soccer Shots season we optioned for an outdoor field under a big tree near a creek (and also one of our favorite breweries). Genevieve was the only girl among six participants and was younger than most. She was just over two, and the group was for 2–3-year-olds. Genevieve was again blessed with a very sweet coach. In fact, she would always stay a bit after class, sitting under the big tree having a snack on her favorite large rock talking to "coach" who would ask her about colors and her favorite things.

Herding cats doesn't even begin to describe the chaos of trying to wrangle six toddlers in a field with little grass in the middle of an intense Texas summer... Many meltdowns, absolute refusals to participate, and water breaks filled the 30-minute practices. But to my surprise, G would sit on her soccer ball in whatever plastic ring color she chose for the day with her eyes and ears on her coach. It's not to say she'd follow the directions well (although she loved kicking the ball at home she most often just wanted to run or hit the ball with her hands at practice), but she would LISTEN to them. As I mentioned before, in gymnastics she was not about directions or group time at all, and while many other soccer players tuned out, she was one of three consistently tuning in. I believe the combination of being a bit older and having a group guided experience before helped improve her ability to focus. 

Towards the end of the season, G learned her Soccer Shots cheer and would perform it regularly and on the way to and from practice. She certainly enjoyed the running drills, and she would sob when the goals had to "go to sleep." She loved "coach" and cheering for her friends when it was time to practice kicking goals. She held hands with a three-year-old boy who helped her during one of the games and loved being outside in the fresh air. And I mean, the stickers... gotta love the stickers. 

Since Genevieve experienced one season of Soccer Shots already, and our new season would mean a new group of kids, a different coach, and a new location we wanted to prepare her for the changes. Earlier this weekend, we talked to G a about her prior season and described the changes. We often give Genevieve an overview of her day, and so we told her too how daddy would cook breakfast at home before and how we'd go to Lion Park after her class. This is actually a method I use ahead of doctor appointments--both her general and cardiology appointments. I find this practice helps her relax and understand what to expect. After we told her about her new Soccer Shots, she was excited and ready to go! 

Her new coach was very nice, there were three other toddlers (one of whom was a girl) and the indoor turf and AC were welcomed improvements. While Genevieve saw and really wanted to play with the yoga balls, she left them alone and kept decent attention throughout. When Genevieve needs a break, she often asks to use the potty. She asked twice to go but did not need to pee either time. I truly think she just needed a break and enjoys the one-on-one parent time when she's a bit over stimulated or bored. While this can be frustrating, Andrew and I take turns and balance taking her and asking her to hold it. She was moderately interested in the activities but said and signed "more horse!" for the drill that involved sprinting (no surprise). She had to hug the nets as the coach's assistant put them away, and I am looking forward to watching her participation in the weeks to come. 

I can't know what struggles Genevieve will have, joys she'll find, or skills she'll gain. But I know that Soccer Shots is an opportunity for Genevieve to explore and experience a little bit more of the vast world around her. She's two, so I am not trying to make her a soccer star or dreaming about a scholarship or Olympic medal. Instead, I am focusing on this tiny little human and helping her find confidence, growth, and fun in the safe and wonderful community she's a part of right now. Structured activities shouldn't predominate the lives of our toddlers, after all, at this stage of development, free and unstructured play is king. But there is certainly a place for these activities. One thing I know for certain is that while I never care what Genevieve is a part of, as a parent I will always require her to participate in something. I can't--and don't want to--choose what that is, but I certainly want to afford her myriad opportunities to uncover where she finds passion, joy, and fulfillment.