# 56: What's Harder than a Cut? A Reverse.

Cutting shows discipline; but reversing shows mastery. Most applaud the discipline required to say no thank you to the Thanksgiving feast when cutting for a show. But next to no one understands the need to adhere to a structured diet once the medal is awarded post contest. In fact, backstage many competitors have indulgent goodies waiting to be devoured. In preps past, I absolutely fit the aforementioned competitor. However, after my first prep I decided to be more intentional about the reverse process; I took this reverse very slow. That does not mean I was hyper-focused, white knuckling it, or restricting myself though. In fact, I would argue my intentionality made the process easier while being aligned most with my higher self and ideals. 

Since many are unaware of what a reverse diet is, I want to describe the process and why it is necessary (and incredibly beneficial to be intentional about). I will describe how I learned this the hard way from my own experiences, and why those mistakes not only make adherence to a reverse so much easier for me to accept, but why I try to support other competitors through the process now. I will also extend how reverse diets can help the average person avoid the yo-yo rollercoaster and stop resting their laurels on being “on or off.” If you respect the reverse, your body will reward you. 

[What’s a Reverse Diet? Why is it Hard?] 

A reverse diet is the process of slowly increasing calories after a diet or competition prep in order to restore your metabolism, hormones, and energy while minimizing rapid fat gain. This period can be 4-8 weeks for a mild cut or up to 16-20 weeks for a really extreme cut or bodybuilding prep where calories get really low. You know a reverse is complete when calories are at or near a maintenance, weight is stable, hunger/energy/sleep/training performance are normal. The marker of being able to increase food without rapid weight gain indicates maintenance has been achieved.  

Calories are increased in small quantities–usually carbs and fats. For example, my daily calories one-week-out were at 1670 (P-180, C-125, F-50). The Monday after my show my calories immediately increased to 1960 (P-180, Carbs-175, F-60g); my coach gave me more carbs and fats, maintaining high protein. I check in twice a week with my coach (sending video and weight). At nearly every check in we have added more carbs and/or fats to my daily nutrition. I also get one weekend cheat meal; except for the week of Christmas, I got three. My calories got bumped up at my most recent check in (3 weeks after my show) and are now 2,645 (P-180, C-300g, F-80g). My weight dropped from 120 to 119.8 and my coach gave me a third cheat meal. This morning after that meal I weighed 120.2 lbs.

I had still been noticeably hungry in the evenings (and even ravenous some days). Because of that, I know I am not back to my maintenance yet. I sleep pretty well, have great energy in the gym most days, but definitely still feel tired at the last part of the day. When I can’t eat, I’ll chew gum, drink BCAA’s/coffee/diet root beer/ carbonated water. With this most recent calorie and carb bump, I expect hunger to decrease or subside because I have enough carbs to place in my day where I am hungry (a banana before working out and a couple rice cakes with honey almond butter in the evening). Throughout most of my prep for Battle of Texas, we maintained a weight of 128 lbs. with approximately 2400 calories and no cheat meals–it is still wild to me how much food I get to eat while maintaining such a lean, muscular physique in this reverse (nearly 2700 calories to maintain 120 lbs. with a weekly cheat meal). 

While reversing, I do not simply eat because I feel hungry. This might sound depriving, but it is not. During a cut, your hunger receptors and hormones are disrupted (think your check engine light is on but there’s nothing wrong). Leptin (the hormone that signals fullness and energy sufficiency) is suppressed. Ghrelin (the hunger hormone) is elevated; thyroid output and metabolic rate are reduced, and cortisol is likely elevated. Therefore, the urgent, insatiable, emotional, or panicked need to eat (and usually foods rich in calories, fat, and sugar) cannot be trusted. For example, the days that have been the hardest for me to weather in this prep came AFTER my coach gave me 25 g or 10 g more carbs or fat respectively. Since I have adhered to my diet, I could notice this pattern and recognize that my body felt the food increase and was like “oh yeah, don’t stop… give me more!” On those days I would NOT let myself have more food, but I would let myself chew extra gum, have an extra 8 oz. coffee, or diet root beer. I want to caution you overdoing it with caffeine, because that will rev your anxiety motor and can make the hunger/edginess you feel worse. On normal days, I have a max of three pieces of gum a day and 2 drinks that are not water. These limitations might sound silly, but as someone who can go overboard, I rest in the structure and can more easily resist overdoing it--it is a slippery slope. 

I think working closely with a coach (or accountability partner if you’re attempting this on your own after a diet phase) really helps with adherence. It is hard to resist the physiological urges to eat, especially when the concreteness of the stage goal is no longer in place. I remind myself that my body is trying to help me by ensuring I have enough food in my body (since it hadn’t for weeks leading up to the show). I will remind myself “you were doing all these things before your show with less calories" (referencing peak week) and reminding myself that the discomfort will pass and I cannot control it, I can only weather it. I ALWAYS felt better the next day. Not only would the hunger neutralize, but I didn’t have the guilt, shame, and water retention and inflammation from giving in.

Resisting the mind is a huge challenge–especially when you have loved ones excited to share indulgent meals and treats with you and think your reward should be leniency and a break. Yes, this is a time to start to unclench from the structure of a prep cut, but it most certainly is not cutting the string of adherence entirely (this likely also goes with the increased cardio you might need to do as well). Hunger after dieting is real but not calibrated. A reverse diet bridges the gap between survival hunger and intuitive eating. 

Post-diet cravings skew towards fatty and sugary foods because the body wants energy dense foods–NOW. Due to the previously mentioned hormone disruption, overeating of these rich, densely caloric foods is easy to do (and hard to stop doing). This then makes reversing even harder. That is because these foods (high sugar, high fat, ultra-processed) lead to inflammation and blood sugar spikes that negatively impact your mood and emotions. This can elicit depression and/or anxiety. Even reversing with adherence to my diet fully, I felt hungry and moody at times–it is simply an uncomfortable byproduct of this process. However, the severity is only exacerbated by eating these foods without boundaries. 

Unfortunately, many think continuing to adhere to a diet post-show is restrictive, but when done correctly it can help you have freedom from mood shift, body dysmorphia, and water retention/inflammation. I have been able to enjoy indulgent meals like pasta and pizza with treats like a seasonal latte or cookies, but in accordance with my plan. From this space I am exceedingly happy with my physique, enjoying the food increases, and only feeling stronger and more energized as I reverse. I don’t have food noise or crave anything too indulgent and I attribute that to keeping calories so high through my prep and reversing so carefully. I accept that I am working against my hunger cues and resting in my plan. I find gratitude in the foods and quantities I get to eat and remind myself I am not starving AND this is caring for and respecting my body while supporting long-term goals of building my best physique from the most healthful place possible. 

My weight is up roughly 2 lbs. from stage weight, three weeks post show. I wanted to ease back into cheats. Knowing my body and mind’s sensitivity in a reverse from a cut, I started with off meals and treats that I enjoyed but were not excessive. It is also worth mentioning, I had been refilling for the stage and really was no longer calorically depleted the day of my show–I had been eating all day, and much more than the weeks prior in the depletion phase. But I was up late and needed food, so around 2 am I ate 200 g of chicken, a guacamole serving, an oat and honey bar, with a diet root beer. The day after my show I got my favorite Salads and Go wrap (Greek, double chicken) for the ride home, a simple latte at the hotel, and ate a homemade pistachio cookie from a friend. 

The following week was my first real cheat meal, and we made homemade vodka pasta (I go for an unenriched noodle, no inflammation) with grilled chicken and zucchini. I enjoyed my “dessert” earlier in the day and optioned for a gingerbread latte at Summer Moon while I wrote. The next week we ordered two pizzas to go from one of my favorite local spots (Oakfire in downtown Belton for my local friends) and ate a friend’s homemade carrot cake cookie. I had twelve pieces of pizza, and while I could have eaten more, stopped myself. I felt satisfied but not like I was ready to pop.

This week I was given a Christmas Eve and Christmas Day cheat meal. I optioned for a turkey, bacon, avocado sandwich with house made chips (Megg’s Cafe for my local friends) and a gingerbread latte for Christmas Eve. On Christmas Day I wanted a do-over for the Thanksgiving meal I didn’t get to eat–so I had turkey, mashed potatoes, green beans, cranberry sauce, and gravy. I ate 4 of my own pecan sandie cookies as well. I actually weighed less–slightly under 120 lbs. after that second cheat meal, and my coach increased my carbs and gave me a third cheat meal for the holiday week–where I had four pecan sandies, macchiato with moon foam from Summer Moon, and a burger and fries at a favorite local spot (17 South Main). This morning, I weighed just over 120 lbs. When you reverse slowly your body is USING that food, so bodyweight doesn’t skyrocket. The carbs refill glycogen, protein supports lean tissue, and calories get “spent” on recovery, hormones, and output. 

While I had been using the cheat meals up to this point as a means to reacclimate myself with richer, more caloric meals, my coach did emphasize that my cheat meals should push weight up gradually, not just act as a food break. That being said, I am still very pleased with how gradually I have taken this reverse, though as I continue forward with my cheats, I will loosen the reins a bit more to facilitate a gradual weight gain. Going overboard with food can derail progress and result in excess fat gain. However, cheat meals and eating indulgent, favorite foods can work within your reverse structure without being detrimental to your goals. You get to decide how you’d like that to look based on what you want to do after the reverse phase. This might be maintaining a stricter plan for a future prep or be more relaxed–there is no right or wrong way if it’s aligned to your desires. 

[I Failed the Reverse First] 

When I talk about the power of a reverse, I do so because I failed... epically. After I completed my first show, I had no plan forward; I paid my coach for a 16-week prep and didn’t think about what would come next. He gave me a sheet with percentages and dates to increase calories that I ignored. I aggressively went through the weekend in celebration and continued to binge eat with periods of restriction. I was stressed, inflamed, embarrassed and felt like I had completely–in a matter of weeks–undone the progress I made on my body during those 16 weeks. I could not stop myself from eating, I could not look at myself in a mirror, and it felt painful to be in my own body. So, to the average loved one with someone doing a show prep: NO, total freedom after a prep is NOT the kind thing to do for yourself; structure and adherence with breaks and treats are the greatest gifts you can give yourself. Trust me, ain’t no joy in gaining 30 lbs. rapidly. 

In true Kelly fashion, I could not stop myself from eating–but I could attempt to train to mitigate it. Let me be clear: you CANNOT outrun a poor diet–but I fucking tried. I decided to train for a half marathon, then a full marathon, and would be able to enter another bodybuilding prep after that. I am a firm believer that there are no bad experiences or activities–those are neutral–it is our intentions and motivations that can be flawed. My journey into distance running was not coming from the healthiest space, but I used it as a tool at the time. Now, I no longer use cardio to out-run binge eating habits and in fact evolved to absolutely love it for motivations that stem from a healthy place, and I keep consistently high movement throughout my day. 

 So, I ran a half marathon and then I trained for a full. However, my body hated distances beyond 16 miles. I had the timeline to go back into a bodybuilding prep in May and my second race in April and optioned to cut it back to another half marathon. How much stress was I putting on my body? I finished that second race… with shingles… in my eye. So yes–I didn’t go about this in the best way, but that’s why I orient myself now to taking processes slower and with greater lifestyle integrity. I learned, albeit the hard way. I fought the urge to be all in or all out. Not because this is easy for me, but because I want to better myself and overcoming this perspective is a choice and a practice that we all have power to do IF we do the work around understanding ourselves, intentions, and practice improving our habits. 

In May I entered my second bodybuilding prep. I still hated how I looked and felt in my body. The picture in the bottom left is my first check in with my coach entering that second prep (that’s my body AFTER two half marathons) and the picture in the bottom right is my check in after reversing from that second show. I told myself I would do my second prep for the sole purpose of undoing what I got wrong the first time: the reverse. I was going to do the reverse right this time and continue working with my coach after the show. My husband decided to do the prep with me. He had always wanted to try competing but thought doing it together would enable him to better understand how I felt amidst the process of cutting and reversing and support me through it. He was never a binge-y guy, but even he felt the need and desire to overeat after the show was over. This prep went well, and I used the weekend after the show to be indulgent but not as indulgent as before. I was maintaining around 126 lbs. with my coach (though with comparatively much less muscle than I have on my current physique at a lighter weight). I still found myself over-doing it with my cheat meal on the weekends though. 

My coach gave me a portion of steak and white potato and “one piece of cake” as my weekly cheat meal. I found the biggest “piece of cake” I could and indulged every week (HEB has a very delicious cake-for-two slice of tiramisu cake for anyone wondering). I felt like I would stay in a hamster cycle of undoing that cake each week and really wasn’t improving much. Obviously, this is still lightyears better than my first prep experience. But it still points to how food and caloric binging was in control. I was two weeks out when COVID shut down the show I was prepping for in that back-to-back cut. At the same time, I had just moved to Temple from the DFW area–where I knew no one. Everything closed, my soul-dog received a terminal cancer diagnosis, and I was close to a show and feeling extra binge-y from the cut process. I again fell into binge and stress habits. 

I was able to stop myself but had still gained about 20 lbs. Andrew and I decided to try for a baby and were successful in having Genevieve. I vowed in that process that I would use pregnancy and postpartum like a prep and reverse, though with a more intuitive-eating focus. I felt very successful in my habits and routines and manner of eating. I was not restrictive, nor was I overly indulgent. I allowed my food and movement to be in rhythm with the seasons of life and evolved them to afford me a leaner maintenance body with time and when it made sense to do so. I found myself at a very comfortable 135-ish lb. maintenance in 2024. We began trying for a second child in May of 2024 and we were unfortunately unsuccessful with miscarriages in August and December. After I was able to regulate my hormones and body on my own (maintaining 133 lbs. for approximately two months) I decided to enter a bodybuilding prep. 

During my most recent prep, I was very intentional about eating quality whole foods, moving my body throughout the day, and enjoying challenging cardio. I knew I needed to manage stress and afford my body quality sleep and rest. I focused on sustainable habits–not for a season of cutting–but as a lifestyle. This prep helped me undo some of the byproducts I disliked from the upheaval my body experienced with my miscarriages. The pictures at the top of this post are my back amidst this current reverse. So again, I knew the power of a reverse and its significance for helping me to continue to refine and sharpen myself to my higher ideals. I am currently 35 weeks out from NPC North Americans.  

[If You Misstep] 

    We aren’t perfect, reversing isn’t easy, and there is no right way to do it (especially if you aren’t prepping for something else immediately after the cut you just did). There are usually shame, guilt, frustration, anger, shock, and discomfort associated with “messing up” or going off plan. I want to share a few tips from my experience: 

1. It’s ok to be a C student: if you don’t go balls to the walls off and get back on plan or have a donut at work or a piece of pizza and a cupcake at a birthday party, just get back to plan. Chock it up as life and move forward. The scale will settle in a couple days. 
2. Get back on plan as soon as possible: don’t unnecessarily restrict yourself, your body will reward you by overdoing it later if you do. Just move on with your plan. 
3. Lean into your coach or an accountability person be honest with them and yourself and again, the sooner the better. 
4. Hydrate: BCAAs, Pedialyte, water to drink AND lotion for your skin (especially after a show you were not moisturizing and exfoliating your skin is dehydrated too and it's your largest organ). 
5. Go into your days with a plan and stick to it: yes, I mentioned above not being perfect, but I also recommend holding yourself accountable. Just like in prep you held yourself accountable to a plan, do that in reverse–know when the treats or cheats are coming and while you can make space for some flexibility–hold it to the best of your ability. Discipline rests in structure–then you do not need willpower. I like to think of things as just not an option, so I have no emotional attachment to not having the food. 
6. The feeling will pass, what helps you ride that out? Chewing gum, BCCAs, coffee, water, flavored water, moving your body, or anything else that doesn’t break the caloric bank that can help you ride out the feeling of wanting to eat when you shouldn’t. Can’t trust yourself with serving sizes? Buy individual bags of servings, weigh out a portion and put the rest away, or pre-plan servings in baggies to grab. This can help stop or mitigate the amount of overeating you do when your body wants to keep eating. 

[Takeaways for Anyone] 
    
    With 2026 nearly upon us, I want to underscore the consideration of a reverse diet for anyone wanting to go for the ever-popular weight loss New Year’s resolution. A reverse is not only for a bodybuilder, but for anyone who has spent a significant amount of time “cutting” or losing weight. Most people focus on what it takes to lose weight, but not the lifestyle and habits it takes to maintain a new weight. First and foremost, I think it is worth mentioning that the number you think you should weigh is likely not correct (or at least rooted in anything), nor is it a concrete value: you probably fluctuate 5 lbs. on any given day. 

I’d recommend weighing yourself in the morning upon waking after using the bathroom. Weight is simply one variable related to your body composition. It isn’t everything, but it is a useful measure to be aware of. When you are consistent with your movement and food, your weight will become more consistent too and is a more reliable variable to notice. That means that as the variable changes, you (and if you have one your coach) can make intelligent adjustments to your food and movement. While I don’t track or know my bodyfat percentage, I can use my scale weight and pictures/video/mirror to determine the quality of my physique. I refer to weight countless times in this post, because it is a useful, consistent variable for understanding this version of my body. When you are depleting your body is so sensitive to swings, I don’t want the scale to jump 7 lbs. from one meal (even a cheat meal). This is stressful on the body and will then additionally tax your mind and emotions. Your weight isn’t everything, but it is in fact something to be mindful of. 

Whether you are working with a coach or managing your weight loss goal for yourself, consider focusing on periods of weight loss and maintenance. If you’re only losing and then stop working there, you’ll likely resort to old habits, and your weight will go right back to where it was (or higher). You can consider a “goal weight” to hit and then try to hold that weight and reverse–gradually and slowly adding calories (carbs and fat) back to help your hormones and metabolism catch up. This will also afford you practice at learning and adhering to the new habits you’ve established that are required to be at that weight. Instead of focusing on the goal weight you want to be, I’d recommend identifying the habits that allow you to be in this version of yourself. You’ll have to learn how to navigate holiday eating (I promise there is almost always a reason to celebrate with food), stressful times (people who adhere to diets aren’t free of stress but they cope without comfort food), and otherwise learn what it feels like to be in a maintenance weight (you probably WANT to eat more, but you don’t actually require more food). 

    If you can do this, you will better control fat gain as you increase calories back. For example, I am eating more calories now at 120 lbs. than I was maintaining 128 lbs. before my show. By reversing mindfully, my body lost fat, I retained muscle, and my hormones rebounded. I don’t like to think of bodies as a before or after. Instead, I consider my body as an evolution–and a work of art–that I will forever be refining. I will often have people come up to me and ask for advice on how to have a maintainable, muscular-lean physique. My top suggestions are as follows: 

1. Work with a coach: (yes, yes this costs money, but I promise it's worth it) 
2. Understand the habits you need to sustain to maintain your progress. What you were doing wasn’t allowing you to maintain where you wanted, so you need to do things differently. They've done this before, they understand how to support you, and it's easier to be accountable when you're paying for it. 
3. Nutrition is king: quality, minimally processed whole foods that fit your caloric goals and current bodily needs (people ask me to send them my diet and I always underscore that if they eat the amount I get–which is a lot for someone my size–they will gain weight). 
4. Slow, Steady, Consistent, Maintainable: People want to CUT weight but almost always yo-yo back up (it's not fat loss but weight loss and people really want fat loss which is slow). I recommend aiming for a small weight loss goal (if you fluctuate between 150 lbs. and 145 lbs. try to get that flux to cut down to 140-145 lbs. and then maintain that for 4-8 weeks before cutting again). This is the progression I used to get my bodyweight back down from my pre-miscarriage weight (143-148 lbs. and I got it down to 135-133 lbs. before linking with my coach). I did not track my food but ate quality and similar meals each week at home and used intuitive eating practices. From doing preps, I knew what it felt like to physically be in caloric surplus, maintenance, and deficit and was able to eat accordingly. 

When I reflect on reversing this time around, I feel an appreciation for the presence I’ve had navigating it. At times, I felt uncomfortable, but accepted it. I noticed the desire to eat more or something not on plan and I calmly resisted. I have proceeded slowly and gradually and felt my body feel stronger and look better. Overall, this prep has afforded me my favorite body to date while simultaneously being the easiest one to maintain. I didn’t need to white-knuckle or fight this prep or this reverse. Instead, I accepted that freedom isn’t the absence of boundaries with food; but rather comes from structure. Discipline is really just resting in my established habits and routines. Intentionality helps you stay the course of your higher self and ideals. While flexibility affords you agency to pivot when necessary. Acceptance allows you to weather storms and discomfort, knowing they will pass. And grace gives you peace to navigate imperfection. So whether you’re reading this as a competitor, dieter, or supporter of one of the aforementioned: be aware of the bridge experience that is reversing and proceed through it with acceptance, integrity, and care.

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